New from Uncle John

Elvis has been dead 30 years. That is hard to believe, even for those who actually believe he is dead. I count myself among those who hold that "Elvis has left the building" (as the PA announcer said after one of his concerts).

Our Governor is very concerned about our future. He has mailed a packet to all MO seniors explaining why we should all enroll in a long term care arrangement post haste and telling us just how to go about it. It is seldom you encounter a public servant so devoted to helping the citizens achieve a better life.

Another interpretation might be that he is planning to pull the plug on the state's obligations to the joint state - Medicare long term care support. Of course I am not nearly jaded enough to be suspecting that.

[My Daughter’s] boss is said to frequently invoke the _expression "Off like a prom dress" when he is hurriedly making an exit from a meeting or from the office. I thought I had heard most of these sorts of _expressions, but this is a new one me. It just goes to prove you are never too old to learn new tricks.

Gold was priced at 666 dollars an ounce on Friday. This is an ominous valuation. I just can't see anyone wanting to place an order at that particular price. Call me superstitious.

The Carman Trails school is now in the news. They have decided to teach the boys and the girls in separate rooms. It is said the boys learn better in a louder and less organized situation, whereas girls thrive on the quiet and orderly. So starting now, all Carman Trails graduates will be at the head of the class in Junior High. I think it may be a help to the self esteem of boys. It always seems like when the teacher asks a question in elementary school, primarily the hands that go up are girls' hands. The fellows surely suffer esteem setbacks. I would possibly take exception with the paper's characterization of this experiment as "pioneering." If I'm not mistaken, various parochial schools and certain private schools have done things this way since forever. The paper was also probably blameworthy in that they reported on a boys class studying mathematics while the girls class selected for coverage was writing essays on bad hair days.

Minnesota had a bridge collapse then China had a bigger bridge collapse. Utah had a mine collapse then China had a bigger mine collapse. If those fellows are going to keep copying like this, we could lead them a merry little chase.

The illegal alien who allegedly shot the four students in NJ apparently has a very long rap sheet and is currently on bail from a vile predator arrest. Apparently the judge was aware of the history but still reduced the existing $150K bail down to $50K. There is much alarm about this and justifiably so. Even so, someone had to post some bail to get this cat back out on the street. I'm betting he nor his kith nor kin could muster even the reduced bail money. So I'm wondering why no one is asking who paid the money that put this cat back out on the street. I think that would be illuminating.

Speaking of this NJ shooting, it seems to be consistent with a crime wave in general in NJ. A local politician says this crime wave is attributable to our President since he has diverted money from crime fighting and sent it to Iraq. Sort of sounds like the bridge and hurricane stories. Hey, Bush is being unfairly blamed here. True, he spent billions in the Middle East but this did not cause him to curb spending elsewhere. He has handily outspent any President you can name on any general spending category you can name.

When Rove announced his plans to leave W's side, candidate Edwards said, "Good riddance." Now that's class.

McDonalds mistakenly provided a cheeseburger to a customer who ordered a hamburger. This may not seem like a big deal to you (and in fact some customers might even be pleased about the mistake) but it was a big deal to this customer. McDonalds is being sued for $10,000,000. The customer has a cheese allergy.

A local school district was slated to start August 13. What is the rush?

A new tougher poison ivy variety is taking hold. Someone speculated that it has evolved as a response to the richer CO2 environment on planet Earth since fossil fuel consumption has risen. Where do they find these guys? Oh yes, this same speculator reasoned that this new poison ivy scourge was Bush's fault.

The Cardinals played the Cubs yesterday. The Cardinals had twice as many hits, three times as many home runs, one half as many errors, three less struck out batters, one fewer walked batters, and two less wild pitches. The Cards lost by two runs. Some things are hard to figure.

The new challenge is "Set me free, why don't you baby?/ Get off my life, why don't you baby?/.../ Why do you keep comin' round,/ Playing with my heart?/ Why don't you get out of my life,/ And let me make a brand new start?/ Let me get over you,/ The way you've gotten over me."