Saturday with Uncle John

I am a little slow posting this, but here is another one from Uncle John.

Happy Father's Day to all fathers out there. Happy beginning of summer. Happy St. Jean Baptiste day to all you Quebecers.

I have a proposal. If your broadcast or article includes a feature on what Paris Hilton ate during each of her three daily meals in jail, then you should no longer be allowed to call your program a "news" show or to refer to yourself as a journalist. There, I think that would pretty much rid us off the whole lot. On that same lame subject, I see her dad is planning a huge getting out of jail party for her. He is allowing the big Vegas venues to fight over who gets the honor. He, being a bit short on cash I guess, is asking the site to put up $50,000 or more for the party. I think it's fair to say that any good father would have done the same for their daughter.

Roger Federer fans had to watch him struggle and fail against the irrepressible Nadal at the French Open. Late in the match, commentator Mary Carillo said, "Roger's break point numbers don't look impressive." Well, Mary is a master of understatement. At the time Federer had secured one break in 17 opportunities. I would wager that beyond not looking impressive, this was record shattering. All the American men contestants bowed out in the first round. That too is unbelievable.

After two series against American League teams, the Cardinals had given up 53 runs in 6 games. Mike Shannon said, "It hasn't been very enlightening to say the least." I think Mike may have invoked the wrong word there. It has been VERY enlightening, but it hasn't been very enjoyable. Those figures preceded the recent series against the Royals. Kent proclaimed that he would visit great bodily harm upon himself if we lost to the worst team in baseball. They beat us 8-1. The Redbirds won game 2. With the Cards scoring 8 runs in the rubber game, Kent would seemingly have escaped his own intemperate remark. Alas, our pitching surrendered 17 runs to the mighty Royal lineup in that game.

While on the subject a baseball, why is it that every time the camera shows fans behind the plate in a close up shot, a large number of them are using cell phones? When the close up is on other parts of the crowd, few if any are using their phones.

In previous episodes I have chronicle how the terminology applied to border jumpers who stayed here changed from "illegal aliens" to "illegal immigrants" to "undocumented immigrants" to "immigrants awaiting their paper work." Senate Majority leader Harry Reid has now taken it another step. He now refers to the illegal aliens as "undocumented Americans."

While on the subject of Harry Reid, he boasted that the Senate was going to give Antonio Gonzalez quite a comeuppance. I'm not sure who this Antonio Gonzalez is. I think he might be a striker on the Juarez soccer team. Meanwhile the loudmouthed obstructionist minority blocked an attempt to defame attorney general Alberto Gonzalez.

Mr. Hilton isn't the only one short on cash. John Edwards was speaking to an audience of mostly students and the event charged $17 for tickets to hear the fabulously rich malpractice lawyer speak. I hear him almost every day, but at least it's free.

Cardiovascular problems are still the number one killer, by far. Virtually everyone has a stake in advancements in this field. Relatively few are likely to be affected by HIV AIDS and most of these are folk who knowingly ignore the known preventions. Despite the fact that it affects vastly fewer people and despite the fact that means of it's prevention are known for the vast majority of its victims, more medical research money is spent on HIV AIDS than cardiovascular issues. Hmm.

Kris recently purchased an ATT/Singular service. She applied for the hefty rebate. She had to jump through quite a few hoops. She got a text mail message saying that her rebate had been mailed and that she should expect it within three weeks. I am wondering where they mailed it from (please excuse the grammar).

Apparently precious little of the billions allocated by Congress for border security measures has been applied to the task so far. Homeland Security Director Chernov does not seem to think he or his department share any culpability in this matter. He says if we want better border security, we must "give him the tools." I have to admit, I am very confused about all this. I would swear that every bureaucrat in the past has always used "give me the money" as the response.

The city of St. Louis, ever keeping its citizens in mind and looking for sources of revenue other than taxes, launched a suit against past manufacturers of lead based paint. Lead based paint was banned by the federal government in 1978. The suit was dismissed. Some court actually did something intelligent.

The last challenge word was "turpitude" meaning baseness or vileness. There have been several infamous instances in which the guest speaker was introduced or the official was characterized as a person of great moral turpitude. This is always intended to convey great praise it seems but actually is a grievous blow. In the case of politicians, the usage is accidentally correct. The lyrics challenge was from The Air That I Breathe. NT alone gave the Hollies as the artist. This song is currently being used in NAPA Auto Parts ads for air cleaners. This application seems somewhat less romantic than the original thrust of the song.

The new challenge word is "propitious." The trivia question: name the states that have a capitol beginning with the same letter as the state. The new lyrics are: "Well, it was kind of cold that night;/ She stood alone on the balcony./ Yeah, she could hear the cars roll by;/ Out on Four forty-one like/ Waves crashing on the beach./ And for one desperate moment there,/ He crept back in her memory./ God it's so painful when something that's so close,/ Is still so far out of reach./ Oh yeah,/ Alright./ Take it easy baby, ..."