Tuesday, May 8, 2007

More from "Uncle John"

Here is the latest from "Uncle John." Please comment on the piece and answer the trivia.

The Cardinals lost again yesterday. This is routine. A pitcher who had never won a major league game not only beat them, but shut them out. A player who had never hit a major league home run hit a grand slam. Our # 3 thru #6 batters (the vaunted Pujols, Rolen, and Edmonds) went 0 for 12. The Cardinals have scored 7 runs in the last 6 games. The sports analyst on TV says they have been "not very productive."

Speaking of the Cardinals, the police have issued the official report on the circumstances attending the fatal crash of their relief pitcher Josh Hancock. He had a 0.15% blood alcohol content, was going 68 mph in a 55 zone, was talking on the cell phone with a babe wanting tickets and planning to meet him at a bar down the road, was not wearing a seat belt, had marijuana in the vehicle, had some drug paraphernalia in the vehicle (and for all I know he was eating a Big Mac). The club's general manager said Josh made some bad decisions that night.

Warren Buffet's $52 billion is no longer good for the #2 position behind Bill Gates. He has been surpassed by a telecom mogul in Mexico. I'm wondering if some 12 million Mexicans had stayed in Mexico and had purchased phone service from him, perhaps this gentleman could even catch Bill Gates. We'll never know.

Speaking of illegal aliens (I mean immigrants awaiting their paperwork), a news report from the Hamptons indicates dire conditions this summer. The legal temporary work visas sought by the local employers for the summer are apparently capped despite applications being up 30%. Apparently no citizens will do these jobs tending to the rich and famous so the local are projecting a severe employee shortage in the area and predict that some employers will be forced to hire illegals.

This incident happened some time ago but for some reason it just came back to me yesterday. Perhaps it was the Run for the Roses at Churchill Downs that stirred the recollection. There was a truck wreck nearby in western IL. It was a livestock truck hauling a bunch of horses. The animals were injured to varying degrees in the collision. Contributions were sought far and wide to help pay for the repairs to these animals. I think the taxpayers of IL may even have picked up part of the bill. The interesting thing is that the truck was on the way to a facility in which the horses were to be destroyed. The last I heard, they were looking for people to adopt these horses. If they ended up sending them on the intended facility, I'm sure they would not advertise that result.

I apologize to all readers. I passed along a story that the WY State government had banned all non-Interstate motor traffic for a given week. I have been had. It was a great article tucked among other stories (in my cycling magazine) related to biking and walking initiatives throughout the country. I failed to notice the date on the article. It was April 1, 2007. I am so ashamed. Please disregard my comments about the elected officials of WY. Maybe they are not idiots after all (but then again, they probably are).

May is national bike month. Bill Nye opines, "There is something wrong with a society that drives a car to work out in a gym."

Boxer Mike Tyson apparently sold a house for $4 million. The rapper guy who bought it apparently put another $6 million into it during
a general renovation. A realtor who toured the finished product said it was very nice and tasteful, except for the stripper poles.

The price of gasoline jumped from $2.999 per gallon to $3.199 in Cambridge City, Muncie, Indianapolis, Effingham, and St. Louis on the night of May 2 at virtually all competing brands. There is no collusion. Dad makes the point, with which I wholeheartedly agree, that it is past time to drop the idiotic 0.9 cent appendage.

There is some story about paddlefish eggs being illegally harvested in Vevay, IN and illegally passed off as Caspian Sea sturgeon roe for caviar. As Carolyn would say, "caveat emptor" (or something like that, meaning buyer beware).

The population has grown by 70 million since 1980. Highway miles have increased by 5% in that period. Can you say "traffic congestion?"

Hillary picked a Senor Nunez, CA State assembly speaker, as cochair of her campaign. I guess farmer Jim Smith from Peoria didn't have much of a chance.

Cardinal broadcaster Mike Shannon: For the redbirds that bump in the road has become an avalanche.

Undaunted, I continue with the vocabulary and trivia challenge. The new word is "smarmy." The new trivia question is: what is the hero's name in the Oscar award winning film, Gladiator? Extra credit for the full name. The new lyric challenge is: "And I found out a long time ago,/ What a woman can do to your soul./ Ah but she can't take you any way,/ You don't already know how to go."

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Maximus. I wish I knew the song because it sounds like a good one. Sorry about the redbirds. I acutally feed the real ones at my apartment. They are beautiful. I also have some orioles. If only I could get them to play ball in my backyard.

I also have a question. Does anyone know if the birds are named after the catholic cardinals or are the catholics named after the birds. I have always wanted to know that. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

I believe the song is 'Peaceful Easy Feeling'by the Eagles.

I'm really liking your segment, Uncle John. Keep it going.

- Jethro

Anonymous said...

Uncle John, speaking of the dearth of highways to match population growth, one of the big opponents of "urban sprawl" and more highways just got busted for DWI. That would be Ted Mondale. Maybe he should stick to his precious light-rail mode of transportation and keep the rest of us safe on the highways.

-Jarrod

Anonymous said...

Well written article.