Thursday with "Uncle John"

Did you realize that the letters in George Bush can be rearranged to give "he bugs Gore?"

When asked what his family was doing about the global warming crisis, Obama came up with "changing light bulbs." This of course begs the question: "How many senators does it take to change a light bulb.? I've heard the favored bulbs are made only in China and that they contain mercury. Beyond all that, I'm not sure I want anyone in the White House who is of the sort that thinks changing light bulbs is the answer to global warming and/or energy independence. The same goes for the sort that pays $400 for haircuts.

Speaking of wannabe White House occupants, Hillary says she will treat all leaders of all countries with dignity and respect once she is President. It is disconcerting to think that she would be more civil and deferential to our friends from Venezuela, North Korea, Iran, Syria, etc., than she is to anyone in the Administration of the USA.

Sheryl Crow says we all should make do with one square of toilet paper. Maybe this is some weight economy trick Lance Armstrong taught her. Those bikers would never carry two squares if they could make do with one. Maybe it's something she thought up all by herself while she was having fun, as the sun comes up on the Santa Monica Boulevard. Her friend Laurie David says that global warming causes extreme cold results as well.

The Democrats railed, and rightly so, as the GOP congress attached endless "earmarks" and huge non germane spending to many of its appropriations bills. The Dem's own bill, which they said was for "funding our troops," happened to have many billions for everything from levees to sugar beet farmers. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

I'm worried about NT up there in Paul Bunyon country. First, there was the Paul Wellstone memorial service, then there was Al Franken threatening to run for office, then there was the new congressman being sworn in on the Koran, and now there are reports that universities are installing foot baths to accommodate the religious ritual of washing feet before prayer. Similarly, shower nozzles about 30 inches above the floor were installed in Kansas City's airport to facilitate foot washing for the many Somalian cab drivers who frequent that terminal. When asked about the obvious "church - state" association here, the authorities said the new showers were there for all to use. Dennis Miller says the last six cab drivers he has hailed didn't seem to have washed anything.

We spent 156 billion on gasoline and motor oil; 275 billion on prescription drugs. Big deal, I want to know how much we spent on bottled water.

Congress passed a bill banning partial birth abortion a few years ago. It passed by a wide margin. It was declared unconstitutional by some judge, of course. Finally, the Supreme Court decided other wise. This ruling prompted much angst from Harry Reid and many other prominent senators. This wouldn't be much of a surprise except for the fact that they voted for the bill. I'm having trouble understanding why these senators are saying the justices are reactionary idiots when the justices simply reaffirmed the very law these very senators voted for in the first place. Did these cats all change their minds recently?

Five teens were shot on a bus in Chicago. There are rumblings in some caucuses in DC that it is time to pull out of Chicago.

Purdue Pharma, provider of Oxycontin, admits it mislead consumers. I have never heard of a company admitting fault before. They usually pay the fines under some agreement by which they still maintain innocence. The fine here is a cool $634 million. They said it was no more addictive or subject to abuse than other drugs. I wonder if Rush Limbaugh was deposed for evidence to the contrary.

Hospitals sometimes find it impossible to collect the fees that are owed by patients. If the best efforts of their folk, lawyers, and collection agencies fail, then they reclassify the amounts (usually unnecessarily outrageous) as "charity care" and brag about this altruism in a sappy press release.

We were supposed to be hit with near record floods from the Missouri River but some 20 levees broke in western Missouri and relieved much of the surge. Still, it is very high. Global warming caused this and the droughts.

The new challenge word is "butte." The new trivia question is what is the most popular name given to boys born in the USA in the second half of the 20th century? The lyrics challenge is: "There I go, on the road again./ There I go, up on the stage./ There I go, singing my songs again./ There I go, __ __ __."